I’m the Fly on the Wall
Marine Corps Base Camp Pendleton has a visitor’s center located near its main access gate in Oceanside. If you want a pass to go on base, you must get one at the visitor’s center. They don’t accept appointments. I arrived at 8:30 a.m. on Tuesday morning.
As I flew in the door, I counted nearly forty people already seated waiting to get a visitor’s pass.
I didn’t need a pass, so I took a seat on the first wall I found to check things out.
It appeared that the first step was to stand in line and submit paperwork. After that you take a seat and wait for your name to be called.
As I sat on the wall, my attention was drawn to an outspoken man of let’s say about sixty years of age. Hard for me to give his exact age because… well, I’m a fly.
Entering right in front of me was a middle-aged woman of Hawaiian descent. How do I know this? I’m a house fly. I watch a lot of TV.
As the Hawaiian lady stands in line, the ‘say about sixty man’ says something to her in some other language. It might have been Hawaiian, but I wasn’t sure. He then says, “I learned how to say that in seven other languages depending on where I was stationed. When I was in Honolulu for two and half years, all my children had friends with names like Alani, Kona, Leilani, Healani and Kapuni so I also learned a bunch of Hawaiian phrases.” He added, “To this day, my favorite dish is Loco Moco, but I don’t like Poke.” She smiles, waits her turn in line, turns in her paperwork and finds an open chair on the opposite side of the room from ‘say about sixty man.’
I changed seats and took one on the ceiling just over the ‘say about sixty man.’
By the way, he had a small mixed breed dog. At this point his dog lets out a high-pitched bark, and I’m a little concerned that he/she is barking at me. Even though I’m sitting on the ceiling, I always get more nervous around dogs. The ‘say about sixty man’ says, “Oh my little girl is just hungry for a treat.” He reaches into one of his pockets and offers her a little cookie snack. I see a tiny crumb fall to the ground and buzz down to catch a bite. In mid-flight, I change my mind as it’s too close to that dog.
That said, ‘say about sixty man’ speaks quite loudly whenever he has something to say, which makes everyone in the visitor’s center privy to his commentaries. I don’t think he’s talking to everyone, but it sure seems like it. I decide to leave my ceiling seat and take another one on a side wall.
This is when I hear ‘say about sixty man’ tell the young lady seated next to him that his dog’s name is Dumo. I think that’s what he said, or Domo. I’m not sure.
He then introduces himself. “I’m Jerry Walazinski.” I think she told him her name. But just as she did, someone slammed a door on my wall, and I instinctively flew off and didn’t hear it. I buzzed around a bit and had to dodge some hand waves until I found another place on that same wall where I could continue to listen to Jerry Walazinski.
Jerry was about five nine, two hundred plus pounds and a full head of uncombed white hair. He was wearing an oversized zippered gray sweatshirt and had a knack for talking to strangers.
The young lady whose name I didn’t get when the door slammed was dressed in tight black jeans, black lace-up boots, and a black tank top. Her shoulder-length blond hair covered up some tattoos on her upper arms. Let’s call her Door Slam.
I wasn’t picking up on Door Slam’s sexual orientation, but Jerry was. I couldn’t resist listening in as he chatted her up non-stop. It was like he was a distant uncle that hadn’t seen her since she was a baby and was totally into what she had grown up to be. They were talking about some very intimate things regarding same sex stuff… at least, he was. Even from my elevated wall position, it was over my head. For your benefit, I’m just sharing highlights. In short, Jerry was straight, and Door Slam was not.
Jerry is in an aisle seat and two ladies close to his age are standing in line to turn in their paperwork right next to him. From his chair he looks up at them and says, “Hello Ladies. If you’re sixty or younger, you are beautiful. But if you over sixty, you’re gorgeous.”
I’m just a fly, but I can feel a genuine compassion in Jerry’s words, even if what he’s saying is questionable. I dart to another wall position just in time to see both ladies roll their eyes. One of them was moving her lips, but I couldn’t make out what she said. I’m sure it was related to the eye rolls.
Meanwhile, Jerry is getting to know Door Slam. I can’t say how he got there, but he’s saying things like how important it is to know who you are and what you want and need in life.
Jerry’s a retired career Navy guy who was stationed all over the place. Not unlike what I do on a daily basis. He was telling Door Slam stuff about his Navy career and asking questions related to her partner. Her girlfriend is a civilian and works in a HR department in a hospital off base. She’s a Marine getting a pass for her girlfriend.
With almost forty people in the room, there was a lot of activity going on, but I couldn’t take my feelers off Jerry. After two hours or so a visitor center employee called out, “Jerry Walazinski window five.”
Jerry got up and went to get his pass. As he walked to window five, he announced to all, “Finally they’re getting rid of me. I’m getting out of here before lunch time. Duomo is happy.” Duomo? Maybe that’s it.
I buzzed just above their heads, dodged a few hand waves so I could get the dog’s name straight. I stopped on the wall above window five. If he says it one more time, I’ll get it right.
After Jerry got his pass, he turned to the forty or so people and one fly on a wall and repeated the same thing he said to the ladies earlier. Only this time, he said, “Before I leave, I want all the ladies here to know if you are sixty or younger, you are beautiful. For all the ladies sixty and over, you will always be gorgeous.”
I did a fly over spin like a F-16 upon hearing that one again. While spinning, I noticed a majority of the people in the room thought that was pretty funny the second time round. Of course, some were rolling their eyes, probably wishing they could lift off and do an aerial spin like me.
But he wasn’t done…
He pointed at what’s her name, Door Slam, and said, “Come up here.” In front of everyone that was watching and listening, as if they did what I did for a living, he directed her to get out of her chair and come up to him. He gave her a big hug. “You are beautiful. Keep doing your thing. That takes a lot of courage.”
Door Slam was a little taken back by that gesture, but accepted it like a good sport and sat down.
Jerry Walazinski and his dog Duomo left the building at 10:45 a.m.
I decided to buzz around and wait to get a ride out with the Hawaiian lady. If you’re wondering how I got here, it was in her car. I spent some good times in her house and was looking forward to making the return trip with her. She has a really big TV.
- © Michael Cantor 2021
Michael Cantor was born in Los Angeles and earned a BA in Humanities from the University of Southern California. In 2018 he published, “Thanks for Taking the Time to be Prepared. A Handbook for Emergency Preparedness Tips."
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